There's a reason for everything. My not having posted in a while: I'll tell you why. Windows. These problems have yet to go away. Not that I'm surprised, or anything. And, the Dow is at it's lowest since '03. Right now, it looks like it's at 7552.29. And guess what: I'll tell you why. Windows. You see, Microsoft is in the NASDAQ, with pretty good stocks along with Apple. So what does the Dow have? Dowels. Bad pun. But still. And we all know that most car crashes are caused by younger people. I'll tell you why: (surprise!) Mac. You see, it works like this. College kids tend to get Macs more that old people, because they are smart. Sort of. They have awesome Macs, so they make some awesome home videos and show them to their friends. Their friends like them, so they decide to submit it to the movies. But, since they use Macs, they are obviously more educated, so they search for a way to stream their video to a bigger audience. And, with a Mac, they can get around the internet faster, so they do not grow impatient in their search and find instructions and software to help them hack into NASA's satellites. They then find directions on how to construct an ultra-powerful projector. Once they are done, they wait for a cloudy night. They set up their projector, followed by a pair of speakers directed creatively at an angled Mac Cinema Display, which directs the sound to the world. They start playing the video, both on the sky projector and the Cinema Display, then head to their computer. They tap the satellite, and stream the video to every internet-conncted 'puter in the nation, plus every TV. Meanwhile, John Smith, a really old dude, is driving 30 miles an hour on the freeway, thus slowing down the 927 cars behind him. His vision is distracted for a second, as he sees lights flashing in the sky and monitors lighting up in houses. Faintly, and then louder he begins to hear...the Pokemon theme song! Mr. Smith chuckles to himself, remembering that old show, before he realizes that he's stopped moving. The other cars pile up behind him. One of the radios in another car flies through his back windshield and he hears: On interstate 492 tonight, we have a 928 car collision. Officials are directing traffic onto the other side of the freeway. They have requested us to announce that kids using Macintosh computers for devious purposes are to be shunned.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
I'll Tell You Why
There's a reason for everything. My not having posted in a while: I'll tell you why. Windows. These problems have yet to go away. Not that I'm surprised, or anything. And, the Dow is at it's lowest since '03. Right now, it looks like it's at 7552.29. And guess what: I'll tell you why. Windows. You see, Microsoft is in the NASDAQ, with pretty good stocks along with Apple. So what does the Dow have? Dowels. Bad pun. But still. And we all know that most car crashes are caused by younger people. I'll tell you why: (surprise!) Mac. You see, it works like this. College kids tend to get Macs more that old people, because they are smart. Sort of. They have awesome Macs, so they make some awesome home videos and show them to their friends. Their friends like them, so they decide to submit it to the movies. But, since they use Macs, they are obviously more educated, so they search for a way to stream their video to a bigger audience. And, with a Mac, they can get around the internet faster, so they do not grow impatient in their search and find instructions and software to help them hack into NASA's satellites. They then find directions on how to construct an ultra-powerful projector. Once they are done, they wait for a cloudy night. They set up their projector, followed by a pair of speakers directed creatively at an angled Mac Cinema Display, which directs the sound to the world. They start playing the video, both on the sky projector and the Cinema Display, then head to their computer. They tap the satellite, and stream the video to every internet-conncted 'puter in the nation, plus every TV. Meanwhile, John Smith, a really old dude, is driving 30 miles an hour on the freeway, thus slowing down the 927 cars behind him. His vision is distracted for a second, as he sees lights flashing in the sky and monitors lighting up in houses. Faintly, and then louder he begins to hear...the Pokemon theme song! Mr. Smith chuckles to himself, remembering that old show, before he realizes that he's stopped moving. The other cars pile up behind him. One of the radios in another car flies through his back windshield and he hears: On interstate 492 tonight, we have a 928 car collision. Officials are directing traffic onto the other side of the freeway. They have requested us to announce that kids using Macintosh computers for devious purposes are to be shunned.
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